Pardon my Sniffles

Nothing is grosser than someone in food service sneezing all over the place.

...Especially while carrying your food.

Never mind the fact that the food is wrapped. Germs are crafty critters, and somehow (despite our obsessive hand-washing) manage to bound from person-to-person. This is especially terrifying now, because of the swine flu (we won't get into the politics of that) that seems to be ravaging schools and workplaces.

I admit that it's gross. Nay, it's downright nasty. Food-service employees actually shouldn't be to work if they're sick--And I expect nothing less from you than to request your food re-made. You didn't pay for germs, you paid for delicious never-frozen food served to you on a worn plastic platter.

But please, if you do request as such, do it with politeness in mind. We didn't sneeze/cough/dribble on your food on purpose; on the contrary, we probably feel terrible and awkward about it. We might even be psychic: "He definitely wants a new burger, I just know it"-- but we did by no means intend to infect you with the plague. On top of that, if we're sneezing/coughing/dribbling, that means we're probably sick, and feel gross and yucky anyway.

So, here's the deal. We'll re-make your food with just as much love as the first time (maybe even more) if you ask politely. Some examples might be:

"I'm sorry that you don't feel well...but could you please remake my (food item)? There's no rush on it, I just want to make sure I'm not passing anything around."

Or even just make up an alternative excuse. We may be smart, but we're too scatterbrained to notice if you lie about the quality of your food.

"Hey these fries are a little old, would you mind making a new batch? No rush."
"I'm really sorry, I must not have spoken right... can I get EXTRA (topping) on this? I think you pressed 'no' instead." -- This would be after you carefully take the infected food item and take the topping off of it, of course. We won't know the difference as long as you're silent as a ninja.

Notice my use of 'no rush.' Being in fast food, we're always trying to get things done quickly, under the stress of impatient customers. We delight when someone decides they're going to let our hearts run at normal speed.



But you know the ultimate BEST thing you could do for an employee (especially if they're under eighteen)?

Complain to the manager.

"They've been coughing all over the place. That's not sanitary. I hate to be so blunt, but it would probably be a good idea to send them home."

We'll earn respect points from our boss for coming in sick (hopefully, anyway!), and we'll get a free day off. Customers are happy because they don't get sick. The only downside to this is that the manager will have to call someone in to fill a shift...


The meat:
Sickness is icky. To keep from eating food infected by the employees, stretch the truth a little to get your food re-made. Maybe even request that an employee get a day off, or change positions.