We're Honestly Not Stupid

...No matter how much you think we are.

Okay so I was working today. All the orders had been taken, so I went out into the dining room to wipe down some tables. While I was cleaning, I overheard a conversation between two women:
"I asked if I could get a Happy meal, and she was like, 'we don't have happy meals. We just have our kids' meals.' It's the same f*****g thing. Common sense, seriously."
Her counterpart replied:
"Yeah, I know. Most people here... they're really slow."
Keep in mind that my General Manager took her order. This is the woman that runs the establishment. The reason she corrected the lady who ordered was because of the toy differences; McDonald's has a particular set of kid meal toys, while we have a completely different set. It was a warning to say "You might not get what you expect."

I know I'm going out on a limb here by saying this, but-- *whisper* We're actually not pack animals.

It's a surprise, isn't it?

Now I will admit that if you're in your mid-thirties/forties and are working three minimum-wage jobs, then you might need your priorities reorganized. At the most.

But you, as our valued customer, must understand that most of us are pretty smart. Fast food might not be rocket science, but here are the talents and skills it requires:

-Acting (like movie stars)
-Social Grace (like marketers and businessmen)
-Meticulousness (like doctors)
-Speed, dexterity and reflexes (football players, baseball players, any competitive athlete...)
-A plethora of common sense. (But everyone should have that.)

Okay. So now that you've been presented with the evidence that we're actually MVP Doctors of acting and marketing and not butt-scratching monkeys, you should be able to realize that we're actually pretty smart. But if you don't, take me as an example:

I am sixteen years old. I am in the elite women's choir in my school. I'm a mostly-A-but-sometimes-B-in-Chemistry student. When I'm not doing art gigs or drawing comic pages, I'm at school being pumped full of a second language, learning how to create a work of art out of a sheet of metal, excelling in my math class, and being drilled in the mechanics of music.
Therefore, I'm hopefully not a loser. I'd like to think I'm not.

Here, I have a present for you: a quote from an article. It encompasses all students who work, although "43% reported working in fast food establishments." (The majority worked in instruction and child care, as lifeguards and referees, etc.)
"Of the total group [of students examined], 49.8% reported working part-time."
"... over 90% of each group reported never cutting class"
"...those who worked reported an average [GPA] of 3.02 (on a 4-point scale) compared to 2.98 for those who did not. "

Okay, you're a sixteen-year-old. It's fine to have a meager job. But what about those over eighteen?

First off, having a loser job doesn't mean that someone's a loser. Sometimes it does, but it usually means that:
a) No other jobs are present at the time (we've hired quite a few new adults because of the job shortages)
b) They actually --oh my goodness-- enjoy it.
c) It's enough for them to support themselves
d) They're a manager of sorts. Therefore it's not even really meager anymore.

Regarding option "b"; there are people in this world who don't want to do great things. This doesn't mean that they're losers with no brains, it just means that they have simple taste. The US seems to have always been considered the land of opportunity: any person, with a little hard work, can become anything they want to be...
The owner of a global company.
A world-renowned performer.
A peacekeeper.
A politician.

We also are a nation that seizes everything that is available (hello obesity, pornography and greed); therefore, naturally, we need to take every opportunity that will lead us to greatness.

Right now I want to refer to a scene in one of my favourite movies, "Benny and Joon." In it, Sam (played fantastically by Johnny Depp) is a very talented Buster Keaton 'impersonator' of sorts . Upon seeing Sam's talent, Benny tries to hook him up with a talent scout. Your name in lights! Vegas! Paris! You'll be famous!
But Sam is perfectly fine with sporadically pulling tricks at his friends.

I'm sorry I got on a tangent, but (if you don't already) I want you to realize that if a job supports a person, they enjoy it, and it doesn't cause any harm to them, what's the point in struggling up the ladder? Success is not made through money. You should know that for a fact. It's a necessity, like food--but also, like food, too much of it can be a big problem. Success is always made through personal happiness.


Okay, stopping that tangent. For now, anyway. To wrap things up, we actually aren't stupid. I don't know what makes people think that-- TV, movies? News? I have no idea. (Blame the media, haha. jk.)

But, anyway. I don't think that our customers are stupid. If you're going to a fast-food place, it doesn't mean your lazy, either; just that you either really enjoy our food, or are to busy doing really awesome things (we had "The Iceman Cometh" bicyclists coming in all day today) that you can't sit down or make your own food. I think, honestly, that we secretly envy you.

I mean, come on. We have to put your food on a silver (or dark brown, same difference) platter. All you have to do is eat it.

...Oh yeah. And pay for it, too. Call it even?